My inner critic is a bitch. She’s a humungous pain in the ass. She’s a cynical, nasty piece of work that’s stopping me from reaching my potential and making me feel terrible about myself.
It’s not news to me that I have one. Everyone has an inner critic. Sometimes they’re in the back of your mind and sometimes they’re right there next to you, constantly whispering in your ear. Its just part of life.
Since going freelance, and especially since launching Begin.Create, I’ve found that I go through periods of feeling down. Sometimes they last an hour, sometimes a day or two.
During these periods I just can’t bring myself to work because I like what’s the point. And then of course afterwards the guilt comes that I didn’t work. So it’s a vicious cycle. I’m constantly beating myself up
For the life of me I couldn’t figure out why. But sometimes it takes another person to make you realise. For the last few months, I’ve been doing a skill swap with a life coach, Angela. Our latest session was such an eye opener.
She made me write down every bad thought I’ve ever had when it came to work, including things that people had said to me. Then one after one, she read them out loud to me.
It’s funny but when you say these things individually to yourself, it just feels like part of your day. But when you hear them all one after the other, it’s the worst. My eyes were welling up with tears.
I was so upset at myself. How could I be so mean? I would never talk to anyone else that way so why should I be so cruel to myself? No wonder I feel down.
So I need to learn how to be my own cheerleader. It’s going to be a long process because my inner critic is so strong, but over time I’m determined to replace those horrible sayings with positive ones.
Together, Angela and I came up with positive comebacks to my critic so I can practice everyday to make her weaker and my cheerleader stronger. I’ve got a way to go but now I know how to shut up my inner critic.
How loud is your inner critic? And do you listen to them?