Ah wedding planning.
It all seems so simple when he’s gotten down on one knee and asked you to marry him. You look forward to getting a pretty dress, inviting all your friends and above all things, being married to the one you love.
I’ll be truthful, wedding planning is a breeze…until other people get involved. Suddenly you find yourself stressing over the silliest of things just because someone is bothered by the wording in your invitation or what you’ve picked for the meal or the inevitable seating plan hoopla. That and the things people try to give you to use in the wedding that aren’t either to the theme of the wedding or to your taste or both.
So fellow bride to be’s, here are my tips on how to stay zen when planning a wedding.
Smile and nod
Especially in the early days of your engagement, you’ll get a lot of people trying to give you advice. Some of it is great. And some of it is bollocks. No I’m not forgoing a seating plan and just letting everyone sit where they want. And no we’re not hiring a DJ.
Smile and nod for the bollocks to avoid an argument. They’re just giving advice, who says you have to take it?
Let the little things go
A lot of wedding details are trivial so think about how much they mean to you. When you find yourself about to have a meltdown you have to ask yourself, does it really matter? Like in the grand scheme of things, will it actually affect the whole day?
Originally we wanted a small wedding. Maybe 50 or so people we thought. Turns out we know more people than we think. So that’s something we had to let go of. I’ve read that you tend to regret not inviting people more than inviting people. Well, unless that person you invited got drunk, trashed the buffet and fell asleep in the middle of the dance floor or something like that.
If costs allow, it’s ok to invite a few extra people if they will make a positive difference to your day.
Don’t let the big things go
In complete contrast to the above tip, know when to put your foot down. If it’s something that’s important to you then fight for it. Not literally but with words. Like as lovely as the floral crown my grandma wore on her wedding day was, it just isn’t my style. Be polite and don’t be a dick. That’s directed at you the reader, not my grandma.
Topher and I want beef for our main course. We love the beef. But we were told maybe to switch to chicken because a couple of people don’t like beef. Since there are around 70 people coming to the wedding, we put our foot down. We picked out an awesome vegetarian dish that people who don’t like beef can have instead. We have people with actual allergies to cater for so those are the ones who take priority. You can’t please everyone.
Laugh when you feel like crying
Last week, Topher and I found out that my cousin has booked his wedding 1 week before ours. In Jordan. So the week before our wedding we’ll be out of the country. Did I feel like crying for a minute? Sure. But after an initial 2am freakout, Topher and I just laughed.
In the grand scheme of things, it will all be ok. Yes I have to get two passports now (mine expired last month and I was waiting until I was married to renew it) and we have to be super organised so everything is sorted before we go, but hey, we get a few days of sunshine! You’ve got to look on the bright side.
Give as much information out as you can
When it comes to guest information, give people as much information as possible and as early as possible. If people are coming from far away, make sure they know how to find out where to stay early on so they don’t bug you later when you’re more stressed.
Ask for help when you need it
As stressful as it may be getting more people involved, sometimes it’s necessary. Especially when it comes to DIYs for the wedding. It may be hard for a control freak such as myself but I felt so much better after asking my bridesmaids and mum to help with making things. Is it worth getting yourself stressed over trying to do everything yourself?
So that’s it. What are your tips for keeping zen during wedding planning?
See my other wedding articles: